well, hello there!

Here I am! Here I am! Life's been busy on all fronts - personal, family and professionally. I'm having a hard time prioritizing properly. Of course the kids come first, and then the work and personal have to fit in as well and all the needs and demands placed on me must be met in a timely and efficient manner. Some days this happens and other days it just doesn't. Some days I ooze productivity and others, like today, I struggle and I know that I will have to, at some point, make up for lost and wasted time. Truthfully I find that I just can't juggle well. I can manage a few things, and as I toss a few balls fall to the ground, bounce and get away form me. How does one prioritize? The kids are most important, but then so am I, as are my health and well-being and when people count on me for projects, I can't let them down either. I think I became so overwhelmed today that it was easier for me to play the avoidance game. It's been raining out all day and my home is cool and damp. I can't get warm or comfortable... I tried the coffee, but it didn't work. I need a good rib-sticking meal but I am trying desperately to watch what I eat as somehow 10 pounds have managed to creep on. They've settled at my waistline. I refuse to blame it on age. I'm active and work out between 3-5 times a week. So clearly I'm eating and picking too much. My love of m&ms and red wine seem to be my downfall. As well as all the meals I've been eating out lately. Ouch! Sigh... My recent trip to Nantucket didn't help any!

I had the most magnificent time there and it was EXACTLY what I needed. I needed to get away. I needed to do something for myself. I needed some time away with "my girls." I had been stressing so much about my youngest and his adjustment to his new school. It's better but not great. He doesn't have his tantrums but he's not enthusiastic. He tolerates it. He's not happy there. I don't see what he's learning as what is coming home is still work that he's done 2 and 3 years ago. I know he's bored. The children have all been divided into their reading groups. But I don't think he's being adequately challenged. I have faith in his teacher but she is limited to the confines of the public school system - a system I am not at all impressed with. I dislike and disapprove teaching to achieve a score. Our schools have top scores but schools teach to the CMTs - the Connecticut Mastery Test. As a result there seems to be little room for creative thinking and teaching. I see the discrepancy between two systems and it really shouldn't be that way. It saddens me and breaks my heart to see and know that two of my children will have such a richer educational experience than my youngest. I feel as though he is getting terribly short-changed. I could fight. I could challenge the system but the truth of the matter is that I just don't have the energy or the desire to do so. I have no other choice and I have accepted that this is the road that we will have to travel.

Last week, the day before I left for Nantucket, we were half an hour late getting my older two to school. My daughter misplaced something that she needed and because I was headed out of town she needed to locate the missing item or she'd have to be without it for 5 days. I didn't want her going to school unprepared. My older two children walk in to school and sign in at the front office when they are late. There is no protocol for tardiness in public school, at least not that I am aware of. Alexander was a half an hour late as well. But no one marked him late. And because he was late he missed the sign up for school lunch. Of course this is the ONE day he decides to have lunch at school. There was no food for him and he was marked ABSENT. He was given a plain white bagel and a cheese stick. This is not something you give a child for lunch. When a wealthy town has a food service there should be extra meals on hand for situations such as this, or for children who have forgotten their lunch boxes. My issue is not with the bagel and the cheese stick, at least it was something to put in his stomach, my issue is that I had a child who was marked absent and no one called the house to find out why or whether he was all right. Suppose something had happened to him on the way to school? I'm not at all a helicopter parent but I need to know that my child's safety and whereabouts are accounted for. At all times. e have our parent teacher conferences next week. It can't come soon enough! Anyhow, this wasn't meant to be a rant - just an honest account of my feelings, concerns and fears... And yes, I know, how fortunate I am... but still, when something is not right with a child, you react as you know how for the well-being of your child.

So, as you can see Nantucket was a much needed treat. That's the next blog post... I have to make sure I have plenty of content so I don't have such a long stretch ever again!

I have to wake up and get ready for dinner - I'm headed to a seafood restaurant, one of my favorites, but truthfully I'd love nothing more than to crawl into my flannel pajamas, light a fire and pour a glass of Super Tuscan!

Cheers!
Happy Friday and have a wonderful weekend!

XOXO

Jessica